First time.

I made dear suffer these days. No!! I think should be " always".

Remember that, he said i'm always the important to him, 2 years ago. But, I can't feel him always. Dear treats me good, give me what I want always, fufill me everything. It is called "care"?

We argued again. For him, sometimes friend is always the most important to him; for me, his friend is always the most important to him. When he admits this fact, my heart broke silently. Tears dropped again.

When I saw him together with his friends, his expression is totally different. He is happy, smile and laugh naturally.

I did a lot of things to him, I never tell him. I tell myself, it is an responsibility. I should do for him. However, I still get nothing from him at last. I never blame him, I should know it early.

I'm sad, when he said something different to me last night. He never said these stupid things to me, no matter how unreasonable am I. This is the first time...

I cried and cried heavily, nobody home, no transport, no food. And bitten by a stupid centipede, but it never pain as my broken heart.

I know I have to bear some responsibilities. I'm stupid and bad enough. Because I feel unsafe all the while...

I will learn to respect him....